Trail of Tears

In one of the devotional time my husband and I had we read about the Cherokee Indian's "Trail of Tears."  It was a time when they were forced to leave their ancestral homelands and relocate following the Indian Removal Act of 1830.  "Many Cherokee felt betrayed for accepting the money, but over 16,000 of their people signed the petition to pass the treaty. By the end of the decade in 1840 tens of thousands of Cherokee and Native Americans were driven off their land east of the Mississippi River. Oklahoma was the new home for the Cherokee which was promised by the federal government to last for an eternity, but that never happened. When Oklahoma became an official state of the United States in the first decade of the 20th century, Indian land there became lost forever and the Cherokee were then again forced to move farther westward. The Cherokee along with a number of other tribes such as the Choctaws and Seminoles lost their land through the Indian Removal act of 1830. One Choctaw leader portrayed the Trail of Tears as "A Trail of Tears and Deaths", the devastation of this event wiped the Native American population of the southeastern United States out of their home land (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trail_of_Tears).

I also have felt like I was treading a trail of tears since the beginning of the second semester.  The trail began with the Nordines' announcement of their retirement followed by their actual leaving on the 11th of December.  After they have left, I also began to sense a lot of issues coming up among the studentry--more particularly referring to the students' behaviors being inconsistent with the upheld standards of BTC.  

During the last few weeks, I have continued to ask the Lord how He was going to use me in these particular times.  I was asking the Lord from which of His dealings with me should I draw strength from.  I felt like I was pulled from different directions.  The trail became even more difficult when these issues have started to affect the whole community--the atmosphere became gloomy and sad, people (including myself) have become unusually quiet, gloomy, withdrawn and unmotivated.  I was just hoping that the week would end sooner than it should.

However, unlike the Cherokees' Trail of Tears and Deaths, this one I know is a Trail of Tears and Life.  Thanks be to God for His amazing grace.  I am truly convinced that the Lord counts the tears of those He loves.  After the pain comes healing and after sadness comes rejoicing for all those who love the Lord.

The Lord has reminded me many things some of which I am listing below.

1. I am a sinner just like everyone else.  I am as needy of God's grace as anybody.
2. I am God's child.  I am His responsibility.  He will take care of me and that's sure and certain.
3. My pain will never be wasted.  He is God Who is the recycling/restoration expert.  He knows what I am made of and He knows how to use them for His glory.
4. He is completely in control.  I may not be able to see the good in all these just yet but I  believe that He's got everything in His hands.
5. I am responsible for my own actions and responses.  I couldn't take responsibility for other's unforgiving and hostile response to the situation.

Lord, please forgive me, a sinner.  For indeed, I was sinking fast and deep in sin when You stretched out Your hand to save me.  Father, help me to love like you love.  May our Christmas be truly joyous even as we daily experience Your love and grace for us.  Amen.